Well I doubt this is how it went down.

(1:34 AM) *namechange*:
I thought that there was originally six and when Tarja found out she was being replaced she killed one

hahahahahahaha
You have no idea how much I laughed when Shanel said that.

About the final bow during End of an Era with John Two-Hawks.

You know, I was thinking today (yes, I do do that from time to time), about this whole firing Tarja thing. In an interview or two (possibly three), Tuomas said that they'd decided six months before or whatever and they had all that time to decide how best to fire her. And I was wondering how in the world that topic would first come up. Maybe it was like:

---

THE SCENE: After some random show six months before firing Tarja.

*Tuomas approaches Emppu*

Tuomas: Emppu, you know, I was thinking that it's time for Tarja to go.

Emppu: What, like assassinate her?

Tuomas: No, no. Just fire her in the most humiliating way possible.

Emppu: You want to videotape us telling her she's fired and then put it on Youtube?

Tuomas: I don't know. We'll make it a possibility, but we should brainstorm some more.

Emppu: Okay, well have you talked to Marco and Jukka yet?

Tuomas: No, not yet. Since I just decided I didn't want her in the band anymore while we were onstage.

Emppu: Right, well you should talk to them about it, and we'll see what happens. I don't care either way. Now if you'll excuse me, I have some Emppuholics to annoy by not showing up outside the venue for them to bombard me with autograph and picture requests. Let me know how it goes.

*Emppu leaves to...god knows where...and Tuomas begins searching for Jukka, finally finding the drummer putting away his drumset with the roadies*

*Tuomas approaches Jukka*

Tuomas: Jukka...Emppu and I were just talking...

Jukka: Could you hold on a sec, Tuomas? I just need to finish telling my drums that they did a marvellous job today.

*Tuomas shuts up as Jukka croons for a bit to his snare drum, not finding it strange at all as he does the same thing to his keyboards after each show*

Jukka: Okay, that's all good now. So what were you saying Tuomas?

Tuomas: Oh, well, maybe I should talk to you about this...alone...

Jukka: Oh, I get it. You don't want Betsy to hear. Gotcha.

*The two walk to an empty place in the venue*

Tuomas: Who's Betsy?

Jukka: My drumset!

Tuomas: Oh, okay. So anyway, Emppu and I were just talking about firing Tarja, but we felt we should make sure it was okay with you.

Jukka: Oh yeah, I'm cool with it. She's been a bit annoying lately with that Marcelo character around anyway.

Tuomas: Great! So I was just telling Emppu we should do it in the most humiliating way possible, so think on that for a bit and let me know if you come up with any ideas.

Jukka: Alright. Have you talked to Marco though?

Tuomas: Well I'll mention it to him, but even if he says no, it doesn't matter because he only joined the band a few years ago and we're all the founding members, so it's really us who get to decide everything anyway.

Jukka: Yeah, that's true. Well you should tell him anyway, and tell him that he has no choice in the matter regardless of what he thinks.

Tuomas: I was planning to.

*Tuomas goes off to find Marco, and finds the bass player seated on a chair, already playing his DS*

Tuomas: Marco, I gotta tell you something.

Marco: What's up, Tuomas?

Tuomas: Well Emppu, Jukka and I plan to fire Tarja.

Marco: FINALLY! God, I'm so sick of her, but I knew I couldn't say anything because I only joined the band a few years ago and you guys are all the founding members, so it's really you who get to decide everything anyway.

Tuomas: Okay, wow, great!

Marco: So when are you gonna do it?

Tuomas: Actually, I haven't thought about that yet.

Marco: How about in six months, right after filming the DVD at our last concert of the tour?

Tuomas: Marco, you're a genius! That sounds absolutely perfect because that way we can make all the profit as Nightwish and she won't because she won't be in Nightwish anymore, and also we can spoil all her memories of that concert so she can't even watch the DVD without crying!

Marco: Yes, well I try my best.

---

And how the idea for the open letter came about? Well picture this:

---

THE SCENE: Sometime shortly following the plan to fire Tarja, sitting backstage before a gig. Tarja and Marcelo are sitting together a bit separated from Tuomas, who is brooding on how best to fire the leading lady, and Emppu, who's got his iPod on full blast. Marco and Jukka are off...somewhere else, likely drinking.

Tarja (to Marcelo): Oh, Marcelo darling, I was just thinking...

Marcelo: Thinking about what, dear? Money?

Tarja: No, not money.

Marcelo (muttering): Dammit, the brainwashing hasn't fully worked yet.

Tarja: No, I was just thinking about how absolutely horrible it would be if I were to get fired from this band.

Marcelo: Don't speak nonsense, dear. Not only is Tuomas completely in love with you, but they'd also be idiots to fire you, because there's absolutely no chance on Earth that they would find a friendly and personable Swedish woman to replace you and also send their sales skyrocketing. Because obviously Swedes are terrible people and not a single one of them is friendly. And also, they all have pop voices, and we all know that pop voices would never work to open Nightwish up to a larger audience.

Tarja: Oh, you're just saying that because I'm Finnish and you know how we all hate Swedes.

Marcelo: Yes. In fact, it's quite probable that they would find a friendly and personable Swedish woman to replace you, and her pop voice would in fact send their sales skyrocketing because it would open the music up to a larger audience. But they won't fire you anyway, because you are the only thing keeping this floating wreck called "Nightwish" afloat. Also, you've already said you were leaving after one more album, so they'd really achieve nothing by firing you.

Tuomas (thinking): Little do they know what we have in store for them...

Tarja: Yes, but hypothetically, no matter how unrealistic it seems, it would be horrible.

Marcelo: Yes, but I'm sure you'd do wonderfully solo, as you plan to when you quit Nightwish.

Tarja: I'm positive I will do quite well. Especially since I wouldn't actually be writing my own lyrics, I'd just find people to write them for me and maybe change a line here or there. But quitting Nightwish and being fired are so different, because one way, I can humiliate them, and the other way, they can humiliate me!

Marcelo: Stop thinking about these things! They're depressing!

Tarja: Just imagine how horrible it would be to be publicly crucified, like if they fired me by an open letter that they posted on the front page of their website or something after the last show of the tour!

Marcelo: Calm down, darling. You'll never have to worry about that. You're so far ahead of the rest of them, we both know that their little minds could never think up such a conniving scheme.

*a lightbulb goes on over Tuomas' head*

Tuomas (thinking): I am so brilliant! We can fire her by an open letter that we'll post on the front page of our website! My genius will never cease to amaze me.

*Tuomas cackles evilly, drawing weird looks from Marcelo and Tarja*

---

Of course I'm just joking. Ya'll know that, I hope.

And I had wayyyyy too much fun writing that.

By the way, since I've no intention of writing in here tomorrow when I post the fanfic update, the dress I'm talking about is this one:

Also, I'm a horrible, horrible person because I hotlinked that photo :S

I'd like to thank Mike in advance for his help (because I still have a couple paragraphs to write before I send it over to him).

@Daria: It isn't just you, don't worry about it. It's a me thing and I have to get over it, and it's better than people just saying "It's good" over and over again anyway :)

Currently Listening: Where Were You Last Night? by Nightwish

I called and I called
Just to make things right.
Have I lost the fight?
Where were you last night?
I beg and I cry,
I keep asking why.
Where were you last night?
Where were you last night?

Good news!

Besides the fact that I am OFFICIALLY done grade 11, of course. With a 68 on my math exam *sadface* BUT WHATEVER.

INTERNET IS WORKING AGAIN!!! XD XD XD

It took about an hour of going through this epic list of .dlls my system is using, but I found the two files that were the "Vundo Trojan", which apparently Avast!, Spysweeper and Symantec can't detect.

So the internet's still slow, but it works, so I am very happy. And you should be too because there SHOULD be a fanfic update by Sunday. Assuming I get a chance to send Mike the rough draft and get his opinions. You may wonder why I always choose Mike for this helping me out with the writing thing, and it's very simple. Because when he constructively critisizes my writing, I have never, ever felt like he was being mean, malicious or anything. Also, nothing he's said has ever made me feel down on what I've written, as has been the case with some other CC I've gotten. Though of course I'm not going to go proclaim it when I feel like shit after anyone's comments :p. It's just me, really, because I'm sure (or at least, I really, really hope) that no one ever has the intention of making me feel bad, and I've always asked for CC on absolutely everything I've written, but I suffer from a self-esteem sunken to depths you could not fathom and so this makes me just a touch hypersensitive aha. It's also why I'm shy online.

Regardless, that's the scoop. I've got some scanners on right now to dig out the last dregs of Malware and Spyware, so we'll just have to hope this never happens again. I intend to get Vista shortly, assuming the store where this computer was purchased still has a copy of it on hold for me to pick up for free, and the offer didn't expire like my mom thinks it did.

I have 54 GBs worth of videos on this system, and that's just in the My Videos files! Never even mind the Adobe Premiere Elements file. Which is completely insane, of course. I think I should go through and delete some of the TV show seasons I've downloaded. But how can I make tribute videos without any episodes?! Haha.

This morning I quite nearly had a spaz because I seem to have lost my GoCard and an entire sheet of bus tickets. And I discovered this ten minutes before I had to leave to catch the bus to school to pick up my report card. So thankfully I found a stray bus ticket on the floor of my room and another in my wallet. Though I only needed one since my transfer totally lasted me all the way there and back again.

It's thunderstorming right now. How depressing. The greyness makes me lazy.

I just thought of one of my aunt's poems entitled "Grey with an 'e'".
"Grey with an e is not the same colour as gray with an a".
That's the only part of it that's relevant to anything that anyone else would know though. I think it's true. I like the way it looks better, for some reason. I don't know why. It just...I don't know.

Haha when I woke up this morning my face was purple. Because of my hair. I guess my hairdresser was right to say I should use a towel over my pillow for a few days, though my pillows seem unaffected unless the purple just doesn't show on the red. The poor white arm of my glasses is dyed purple now though. Who knew it would be so hazardous to put a streak of purple in one's hair. At least it wasn't blue though...I hear blue is the worst colour because it comes off way easier.

OMFG Abby added me on Facebook XD. That site is totally trippy, to hear from people who went to ELI, or like Abby who I haven't spoken to since BEFORE ELI, or hell, even Sinnika, who I haven't spoken to since BEFORE before ELI.

Trippy.

And to think, I'm only 17. Imagine how scary it will be when I'm like 30 and hearing from people that I went to high school with?

Also, my mom is ordering me some more Nightwish stuff, which makes my little withered heart happy.

Oh and Johan was online yesterday, and we talked about Nightwish. Because he likes Anette better too. We both like Tarja, just...not as much. Aha. It might be because both of us are drawn more to rock, and you have to admit that Anette has a far more rock n' roll presence, both vocally and performance-wise, and clothing-wise.

I totally want to steal her wardrobe, you have no idea. Haha. My friends would flip if I showed up to school in anything like what she wears though.

I should take off, I have some posting and reading to catch up on now that everything's finally working again.

If you ever have the same issue that I had, I highly recommend this site >>CLICK!<<. It was the only one that really helped me do anything about it. And it's support for Firefox, but the same virus affects IE, so yeah.

Currently Listening: Singular Indestructable Droid by Papa Roach

This body is just a cage,
You're dead and you're in a grave.
We're losing our minds,
That's just fine,
Living forever.

I'm completely smitten with Jacoby again. I totally watched some vids with him and I remember why I used to love him so much.

No fault of mine.

I've finally started writing the next chapter for the Nightwish fanfic (*the crowd goes wild*) but there is a bit of a problem (*a hush falls over the crowd, their cheering from moments earlier forgotten as they worry about what the problem might be*). The problem is that it doesn't even matter when I finish it, because I can't post it, not by my own volition, of course. But both Firefox and IE7 (both of which I've reinstalled - to no avail) will not open the homepage of Wordpress. And even if they do manage to get to that point (as has happened once or twice in the past week), they don't let me log in. So, you see, until I can get this resolved, there won't be an update (*the crowd roars in an outburst of anger*). Or at least until I can find some other solution.

So just know that it isn't that I have written nothing, and it isn't that I've given up on it, because I haven't. It's just my trusty PC and all its worms and issues rising to the surface as my patience is stretched to its limits and I reach wit's end. Because this is so unbelievably frustrating. Seriously, you have no idea.

EVERYTHING ELSE works FINE except for the internet.GAHHHHHHHHH!

*goes on a killing rampage*

Oh, also, I can LOG IN to the Plaza just fine (not really just fine, but I can), but forget trying to post anything, as the posting box just NEVER shows up. And the Nightwish forum hasn't worked since like yesterday morning. PRU freezes as soon as the fucking background is loaded, so I can't even see the news. Gmail is dead and gone too.

Yeah, please help me before I drown in the river of my own tears.

Not to be emo or anything :p. Though that would go with my new hair, aha.

Currently Listening: Nothing by Oomph!

I come undone.

Nothing can change my life but you,
My sweetest friend.

I come undone.

Nothing can save my life

Until the very end.

Don't you feel that I'm nothing without you?

What Doesn't Work (in both browsers)
- Wordpress
- Myspace
- Facebook
- Gmail (works very, very rarely)
- PRU (works rarely)
- Nightwish forum (works occasionally)

What Does Work (in both browsers)
- The Plaza
- Livejournal
- Last.fm
- Youtube
- Blogger
- Oomph-Supernova

Yes. What fun that the majority of the sites I frequent most don't work. I tried re-installing IE7, but it wouldn't install.

THIS IS BULLSHIT! *tears out hair*
I am so completely fed fucking up.

VIDEO INCOMING!

WOOP!

My Nightwish video!!

It is uploaded.

'Ware before you watch it, though, that it is 9 minutes and 32 seconds long.

Laisse-moi know what you think, if you think, or if you don't. I know there are a few transitions that got kind of messed up. I blame it on the fact that my computer and Adobe Premiere Elements aren't always on the best terms :p.

Let us hope this gets resolved...like...now.

Happy birfday to Emppu! ^.^

*trumpets play, confetti is thrown, and a carnival begins*

In other news, my IE7 is completely shot and I am in fact writing this in Firefox right now, though Firefox is not doing much better. IE is saying my cookies aren't enabled, but they are, as has been reaffirmed countless times since I foolishly hope it will be different every time I get the message. And Firefox is having issues with some websites, as it was before. *sighs* It just never ends. I'm trying to upload my Nightwish video to Youtube but it's just stuck. It isn't uploading. Nope. Damn it all to hell. I just installed Spy Sweeper, so hopefully that will take care of it, otherwise I'm betting FF is going to die soon too, which means I have no idea when I'll be able to write in here, on any of the forums I frequent, or update the fanfic.

Also, phase one of dramatic changes was completed yesterday. Phase two is tomorrow, and phase three is on Saturday. Ya'll won't be able to recognize me by the time I'm done :P
This is the year of finally doing all the things I've wanted to do for many years now aha.

Learned how to play Blood and Harder Than A Coffin Nail yesterday. I think I might start making my guitar videos again, if my video camera will work. *crosses fingers*.

Yeah yeah, I do love Nightwish. God I'm redundant.

oh my fucking god.

I NEED to go to another Nightwish concert RIGHT NOW. It's unbelievable. I'm working on a video you see, which required a good two hours going through their Sydney gig to find some good clips, and it's just...nygah. Emppu, I adore him. You know that though. And Anette too. And Marco. And Tuomas. And Jukka. Though it isn't fair that at the Sydney gig, Emppu and Jukka shook hands with the crowd too, but at the Winnipeg one, they just stood in the middle of the stage talking as Marco, Tuomas and Anette shook hands with us. On the cool side, at least Tuomas and Anette actually went down onto the floor on the other side of the barrier to shake our hands, unlike over there. Plus, Anette wasn't sick at our gig, and we got Dead to the World, SO THERE. But anyways.

Enter the Vault is saying that they have some Nightwish tickets for the spring coming soon SO THIS MEANS NIGHTWISH IS COMING TO NORTH AMERICA IN 2009!!! Totally going to see them again.

I also figured out what's wrong with my keyboard. It isn't my keyboard :p. It's my computer, it keeps switching selected programs for some reason. It seems it's usually DivX interrupting. Also, I downloaded Avast! Antivirus, and it located 9 (NINE!!!) viruses. Mostly Trojans. 3 in my system32 (AKA most important System) folder. I still have fucking Adware/Spyware though. But at least my internet is running smoothly again.

And you know that potential Meet & Greet with Papa Roach? Scratch Meet & Greet and make that full-out Backstage Passes!! My mom is going to find out on July 4th when her work (the US Consulate) throws their 4th of July party. Because the guy in the city government (incidentally the same guy who got me my job shadow at Buffalo Gal Pictures) is going to be there...AS WELL as the special events co-ordinator. Double the chance! I would have to pay for the passes, of course, but I think it would be very worth it, don't you?

Hmm, so I'm digging out the dregs of something to write for the next update in le fanfic, so let us all hope that it pans out, eh? I keep having half-thoughts and ideas for it, but I don't know how I will make them work.

So, I bought a new Nightwish poster, just a pic from the Once sessions. And the guy working there was like, "Old lineup, eh?" and I replied, "Yeah, I like the new lineup better, but the old one's good too." He said, "I hear the new singer's got it. At the concert, she was perfect, dead on, note for note." And I said, "Yeah, she's awesome!"

Yay Anette won Winnipeg over!

So anyways, then the girl working there gave me five Nightwish stickers for free, which is awesome, but I used the two I already had from when I went there with Cory on my guitars already, so I don't know where I'll put these ones. Ah well, I'll figure something out.

To put up my new poster required major rearrangement of the pictures on my walls. I moved my Johnny poster (because I decided I had to put my "new era" Nightwish poster in my room then, if I was going to have the old) up onto the ceiling with Kurt, and moved the pics from the Winnipeg concert over by that poster. I moved my signed venue poster over to the wall with the calendar and shoved my fan art over. As well as my Papa Roach poster. So that made room for my new Nightwish poster!

That won't make sense to anyone except those who have been in my room before.

I could seriously go flat broke at Wild Planet. I hope they order in even more Nightwish stuff (*cough*A new band poster*coughcough*), but when I went there with Cory, the girl said that "Nightwish stuff is really fucking hard to get in." And that's a direct quote :p

They have keychains, as I discovered, posters, flags, patches. They HAD calendars, and stickers. They are awesome. No shirts (yet) though. The carry a lot of Papa Roach stuff too, which is awesome. And TONS of Rammstein stuff. Do you see why I could go broke there? Too bad I can't work there 'til I'm 18 (they sell drug paraphernalia, you see).

Mmm, but otherwise I haven't much to say. I've been listening to Oomph! like crazy today in between editing my Nightwish video. I have a list of videos that I have to finish, but I keep getting my priorities mixed up. I HAVE TO WORK ON NANCY'S VIDEO GRRR. But instead, I will continue on with my Nightwish video, aha.

Ah yes, yesterday was Aiden and Anette's birthdays. HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY!

I drew a comic eons ago (Shanel and Chantal shall remember) about a hypothetical situation surrounding Anette's birthday, but I seem to have misplaced it. A shame, really, since I was going to post it here on her birthday. Well, when/if I find it, I will post it.

Emppu's birthday is in a couple of days.

Know what? HE IS UBER ADORABLE!

Currently Listening: Swallow by Oomph!

Tossin' and turnin',

You know 'bout this yearning,

This feeling you've locked deep inside.

So swallow your frown, my love,

And follow me down, my love.

Earthless

I know this girl, as pretty as can be.

Sign of an Aquarius, she was born on the 18th.

UFOs, snakes and spiders give her the creeps.

She's got a half-life, a half-smile, and lives in semi-luxury,

Questions God, drugs and bullets, and the high school beauty queen.

She's courageous but scared to death,

But that's what courage means.

She's looking for some courage.

She feels faithless, she feels earthless,

She wants to run.

She's struggling for purpose. I tell her,

"Hang in, oh it's worth it.

You've just begun."

Her bedroom is her temple,

Her books and stereo her muse,

And she feels humbled by this equation

And sets fire to all her shoes.

Not because of Henry Miller;

She's just not leaving anytime soon.

And as the smoke pours out her window,

An image forms behind the moon,

And it looks like the face of Jesus,

but if it's Jesus, she needs proof.

At the heart of the matter, the matter of fact, the science of matter:

[We all hope it's true].

She's looking for some courage.
She feels faithless, she feels earthless,
She wants to run.
She's struggling for purpose. I tell her,
"Hang in, oh it's worth it.
You've just begun."

Raine Maida "Earthless"

Is it possible not to heart it?

There is a reason...

as to why there's no fanfic update today.

Actually, there's a few.

1) It's exam week

2) I've been way too busy this past week to even THINK about writing

3) I'm like...depleted of the words. I just don't have the creativity inside right now. Which is why I don't know when the next update will be. Often, these lulls in creativity aren't as long as I think they'll be, so don't hold out for a very long wait anyway.

4) I want the next chapter to be good. I have a feeling it's going to be the longest one yet, and it's a very different style than I'm used to writing, so I want to get it good and hit the nail on the head on the first try. Meaning some people are going to have the "privilege" of reading the rough drafts and helping me write them out *cough*Mike*coughcough*.

Anyways, there's your explanation, darlings. And I'll leave you at that.

Today was a bad luck day *sighs*. I was late for my geo exam (which was crazy easy though).

Gotta make a study sheet for math tomorrow morning.

AND IT'S OFFICIAL. I'm buying my Seattle tix on Friday!

Currently Listening: Paperboy by Stabilo

And I remember reading all about it in the morning,
What an awful sad misfortune.
Yeah, the light had turned red,
But the witnesses said
His eyes were on the girl beside him.

another year older!

Happy birthday to me! I'm now the old age of seventeen. Haha.

Also, I've been wearing solely Nightwish shirts for 31 days now. Meaning I have reached my goal and can stop shunning my other shirts ^.^.

Hope everyone else is having a fantastic Father's Day. I actually get to see my father this year! Yay!

And I can't decide whether to cheer for Switzerland or Portugal in today's soccer match. AHH DECISIONS!

Just stopping in.

Hey guys.

Been having MAJOR internet problems lately, and I just can't figure out what the hell is wrong with it. It isn't just IE7 causing problems, but also Firefox, so it's a computer thing I'm pretty sure. But my Symantec isn't finding ANY viruses (with the exception of the Adware that I already knew I had), so I'm pretty worried at this point that I've got another Stealth virus. I will seriously cry if I do though. Anyways, here's the issue. The first tab in my internet doesn't open websites. It continuously loads them, never times out and never takes me to the site. The second tab usually works, except with some sites sometimes. Firefox is being picky with websites too. Gmail in particular seems to be having trouble on both, but neither is getting me to the Nightwish forum, and PapaRoachUnit is taking eons to load but it gets me there eventually. The Plaza works fine on both, Facebook and Myspace are really picky, and those are the only sites I've tried except this one (which surprised me when it actually loaded). Youtube seems to be fine too. This is the third day that this has happened.

And there's something up with my keyboard too, because not all the letters I type go through, and I have to hit some letters like three times in order for it to show up. This has happened in the past and gone away, so it sure as hell better go away this time.

Anyways, I'm writing to you from my birthday weekend, since tomorrow is my birthday. Yayyy!! Yesterday was my party with my friends, and Sarah and Janice went paintballing with me and Dallas and a bunch of his friends. Everyone had a great time, and Janice and Dallas were actually pricing out guns afterwards, and Dallas was making plans with his friends to go back in a month or two. That's the thing with paintballing: you get the money and you prepare yourself for your first hit and then you'll get addicted to it. And yes, it does hurt to get hit, some places a lot more than others. But it's nothing unreasonable and there are rules to the game (i.e. not allowed to shoot witin 15 feet), so it's not some giant free-for-all. But I didn't ge hit at all ^.^. So Sarah forcefully punched me in the back...because I shot her muaha.

After paintballing, Sarah and I went a little nuts to some Papa Roach tunes and Shanel and Chantal came over. We rented a bunch of horror movies to watch (since even though it was my birthday party, it was also a Friday the 13th party) but didn't wind up watching any as we played Rock Band from 11pm until 2am. It was fun. We played as Nightwish (I made the band...of course, you must have expected that from me, right?). I had to sing...pretty much the entire time. But oh well, it wasn't too bad.

Today a bunch of my mom's family came over and I opened presents and had cake. I got 30 Rock Season 1, House Season 3, Children of Men, a bunch of money and a St.Vital gift card! I chose to wait until tomorow to open my present from my mom and Dallas. I need to get together with Jeanette soon too, so she can give me my prezzie too (goddamn family drama. Would have been much simpler if she had just come to my place today *sighs*). It's fun to hang out with her though, esecially since I never used to really know her, but now we have a bunch of interests in common (music stuffs), so we talk about that and concerts and Marco and Emppu and Anette and Tuomas and Tarja a lot. Poor Jukka doesn't get many mentions though. And she usually recommends some more bands to me, and we just chill and play cards or something. It's nice. It's something I never had with her when I was younger.

Tonight I'm going to visit my dad and Aiden, and then tomorrow until Tuesday night I'm staying with them. I have to give my dad the knife I bought him in Switzerland. I hope he likes it, even though it wasn't super expensive or anything. I'm still pretty disappointed I'm not going to see Holly this year, but these things happen, I guess. It was nice to talk to her the other day and squee about the concert to someone who hasn't heard it all before. Though my dad cut off our conversation before I even told her about Anette putting her hand on my face. I told her about Tuomas' bottle and Emppu's wink though, and squeed for a long time over the wink as she just laughed at me. But yeah. Still crossing my fingers for this fall. I hope you all are too for me?

Well that's it really. I won't be around much. Yay, you get a break from me!

Oh god, Joe made me laugh so hard today because he wrote a poem about me. It was entitled "Emppu's Fangirl". The thing is that he posted it on the great wide internets (AKA the Plaza) and that's how I saw it. Haha he's a great guy. I hope he got the letter I sent him. I wonder how much longer it'll take. Probably a week more to go. Gotta love how long it takes for mail to get through from Canada to the States or vice versa.

Yay! Tomorrow I'm turning 17! Meaning almost 18! Meaning almost DONE with Winnipeg! :D

Currently Listening: Tired of Being Alone by Schiller & Tarja Turunen

What you have dreamed
Is not what I am...so far.
Let me be the one.

Please understand me how I am.

But I don't want to walk alone,

I need your hands to warm my soul.

Holy fuck it's hard to write from Jukka's point of view.

:D

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

GO SWEDEN!

Sweden beat Greece 2 - 0. I watched the last few minutes of the match online, but it won't be airing here until tomorrow. AND THEN I WILL WATCH IT ON THE TELLY!

OH THIS MAKES ME SO HAPPY!

Let us celebrate. DRINKS ALL 'ROUND!

Currently Listening: Getting Away With Murder (Demo) by Papa Roach

Somewhere beyond happiness and sadness,

I need to calculate what creates my own madness.

And I'm adicted to your punishment,

And you're the master,

And I am waiting for disaster.

It's sooo unbelievably annoying.

NO I DON'T HAVE A LIFE. AND YES I ADMIT I AM ADDICTED.

There's an actual post after the meme, though.

Music player on shuffle!

The next time you stand up in front of a group of people, you'll say:

Meadows of Heaven by Nightwish

There's nothing in that song for speeches...

Your favorite thing to say when drunk is:

I Don't Wanna Be by Gavin DeGraw.

"I don't wanna be anything other than what I've been trying to be lately." Would have been better for the first question, I think.

Your message to the world:

Bless the Child by Nightwish.

"Think of me long enough to make a memory."? Or "Why am I loved only when I'm gone?" Or that whole shpiel about innocence and "the cross is only iron" thing at the end? I don't know. There's a lot in that song that means a lot to me. But is any of it really message-worthy?

Your deepest secret:

Van Nuys by Sixx:A.M.

My secret's the obvious things? Or I just don't want to die? lolz. OH it could be "I don't want my mom to know that I never loved my life." Except I kinda do :S (love my life I mean haha)

Your innermost desire:

Just Like You by Three Days Grace.

Indeed.

Somewhere in your wedding vows, you'll include:

In This Life by Chantal Kreviazuk.

"I am right beside you in this life." That's pretty wedding-appropriate, I think.

On your deathbed, you'll whisper:

Omobolasire by Prozzak.

I'm gonna go on about a girl in Africa on my deathbed?!

Your friends say behind your back:

Habit by Stabilo.

I certainly hope they don't say anything that's in that song, because that is crazily creepy O.o.

You say behind your friends' back:

X-mas in Hell by Sixx:A.M.

Hahah that doesn't even work. Unless I don't have any friends :(

When you wake up in the morning, you mutter:

Outside by Staind.

No, I don't think so.

If you were by yourself, lost on a desert island, you'd yell:

Originally I had Nukkuu Kedolla by Indica, but since I doubt I'd be shouting things in Finnish, the next song I got was Under Zenith by Our Lady Peace.

"Maybe they'll come back again."

Right now, your feelings are:

Car Crash by Our Lady Peace.

"Tired and jaded."

What's your excuse for reposting this:

Over The Hills and Far Away by Nightwish

"A secret it must stay." ^.^

Your life's soundtrack:

All My Friends by Our Lady Peace.

"This time, we won't understand again. I'm not waiting for some sense." I guess my life just does not compute.

The day you fall in love will be the day that:

Amaranth (orchestral version) by Nightwish was the first I got...but I kind of need words or something. Hot Show by Prozzak was next.

"We're gonna make a video." O.O

What do people assume when they first look at you?

When Dreams Fall Apart by Alyson Avenue

"I may be foolish, but you are running overtime."

What will be a big challenge in life for you?

Life is Beautiful by Sixx:A.M.

"You can't quit until you try." Maybe. Or, "Just open your eyes and see that life is beautiful." So what, I don't try? Or I don't see that life is beautiful? Actually, both are probably true...

Are you a good boyfriend/girlfriend?

Tomorrow by Sixx:A.M.

"Tomorrow you're gonna have to live with the things you say. Tomorrow you'll have to cross bridges that you burned today." I guess not :/

Do you have a secret admirer?

The Wonderful Future by Our Lady Peace

That could be a sign that I do! Ehhehhhhh...

Will you ever become manically depressed in your life?

Forever by Papa Roach

"In the brightest hour of my darkest day, I realized what is wrong with me." Things aren't looking too great, I guess.

How will you die?

Penny Pass by Stabilo.

That's actually pretty funny, since the song's about dying and all. I gather suicide then?

Is someone trying to kill you?

Swanheart by Nightwish.

No, except, apparently, for my own loneliness.

What's for dinner tonight?

Killing Loneliness by HIM.

"With the venomous kiss you gave me, I'm killing loneliness." It's totally your venomous kiss for dinner tonight.

Your farewell message to the readers of this:

Over and Over by Three Days Grace

Oh yes, you can expect memes over and over.

...

I am seriously going to blow a frickin' gasket if I have to read another Tarja vs. Anette thing. Go check out Nightwish's last.fm page, I dare you.

I don't understand why it's SUCH a big deal. Can't people just accept that someone may like something they don't? If they stopped liking the band after Anette joined, why don't they just piss off and stop caring, rather than screaming loudly all over the internet: "ANETTE SUCKS BRING TARJA BACK!"? No, Anette is not "bad" and Tarja is not "good". Nor is Anette "good" or Tarja "bad". They just are. The terms "good" and "bad" are supremely subjective in this particular case, and no one person can say that their opinion is fact. GRAR! I can say "Anette is so obviously better than Tarja" and then someone can just as easily say "Tarja is so obviously better than Anette", and whose to say which opinion is correct? Because I'll have people backing me and they'll have people backing them, and then chaos will ensue. Because there's no such thing as an un-biased opinion when it comes to this. Everyone has preferences in vocals. Some people really don't like classical vocals, and others really do. THERE IS NO WINNING THIS.

It's seriously beyond me how these arguments still take place all over. It's been a fucking year already, get over it. I can't believe people still piss and moan about the fact that Marco's in the band now. DUDE. IT'S BEEN LIKE 7 YEARS. GET THE FUCK OVER IT. Nightwish obviously isn't gonna boot out a member because some people don't like the way they sound or whatever. If you don't like how Nightwish is now, why not just leave them be and accept that they've gone in a direction that doesn't please you? There's a great big world of music out there, go discover some new bands and get over the ones you're done with. It isn't that hard. And god forbid they should expand their fanbase. You know, we don't want them to keep making money so that they can keep doing what they want to do with their lives, and we don't want them to ever change from how they were on Angels Fall First, right? We want them to keep that exact same fanbase, and that exact same sound. GAHHHHHHHHHHHHD.

Sorry, now I'm getting all pissed off over something entirely separate from the last.fm page discussion that I glanced over today. It's just seriously such a redundant topic, I don't understand why people still fight over it. Anette is the lead singer now, and Nightwish continues to live. It isn't like Tarja's disappeared off the face of the Earth, since she does have her own album out. Plus which, if you don't like "new era" Nightwish, you have NINE years of stuff with Tarja, including three DVDs, countless recorded festival performances, and five full-length albums. So it really shouldn't be an issue.

Then again, some people just like to argue for the sake of arguing (though that's something I'll never understand, since I'm one of those who avoids confrontation as much as humanly possible). I just wish people weren't so mean, on both sides of the fence. Anette does NOT have a "pop" voice, and Tarja DOES have emotion in what she sings. Honestly, has NO ONE heard Century Child? And while maybe it isn't so apparent in Once, it's still there. In Nemo (the song, not the video. She looks like fucking plastic in the video), you CAN hear emotion in her voice. And White Night Fantasy is fantastically done, you can certainly hear emotion there too. Live performances too, like on EoaE, there were some spots where she was so obviously into the music. Or maybe it's just me and I'm naive, or maybe everyone who says she doesn't feel the songs is just blind. I don't know.

And for the next fucking person who intends to say that Anette has a pop voice, try this on for size.

The epitome of pop vs. Nightwish's "poppiest" song

Yes, Amaranth is, compared to other Nightwish songs, poppy. Because it is happy-sounding and gets stuck in your head. That's about where the similarity ends.

I APOLOGIZE. I have been wanting to rant about this for about an eon, and now I have.

ON ANOTHER NOTE.

I found a couple vids from Nightwish's Rock am Ring performance, and the audience is shit :(.

Nightwish probably should have been on the Alternastage, the same one Papa Roach is always on. Seems to me that the fans there might enjoy it more because they aren't solely waiting for Metallica, you know? Also, I guess Marco and Anette could have done more to get the audience into it. I have a hard time watching Nightwish live vids because I always compare their interaction with the audience to Jacoby's, heh.

WIHAA

Amaranth

BBB

For your comparison, 4 minutes and 18 seconds of male hotness.

Listen to him here at Rock am Ring 2007. Oh the poor guy, I feel for him :(. It must suck to have to sing when you're sick. Jerry sounds pretty ill too.

I know we gotta cut Nightwish some slack too, because we didn't get to see their full performance, and it's like Anette's first BIG festival, and we don't get those full audience shots, and I'm guessing that the crowd generally DID suck, because Nightwish is not Metallica, after all. *sighs* Oh well.

Sorry for major Nightwishness here too haha. You all know how I am obsessed. ^.^

Currently Listening: Gott ist ein Popstar by Oomph!

Vater unser im Himmel,

geheiligt werde die Lüge,

mein Fleisch verkomme,

mein Wille geschehe

und den Himmel gib uns auf Erden

und vergib’ uns unsere Gier

und führe uns jetzt in Versuchung

und dann erlöse uns von all dem Bösen.

[Our Father who art in Heaven,

Hallowed be the lies,

My flesh deprived

My will be done

On Earth as it is in Heaven

And forgive us of our greed

And lead us now in temptation

And then deliver us to all the evil]

Edit: It seems Nightwish did better at Rock im Park? Too bad it seems to cut off right as the crowd gets going, but I think I heard some Nightwish chants in there XD. Damn I wish there were better quality videos. LIKE IF THEY HAD STREAMED IT.

Yes I am a soccer nerd

GERMANY WON! XD

I didn't get to watch the match, unfortunately, because I slept through it, but Germany beat Poland! YAY!

I'm talking about Euro 2008, for those who don't know.

While I'm not a major soccer addict, and I don't follow it closely, I did get totally into Fifa 2006 (I was very angry at Canada for not even qualifying) as people shall remember from the France vs. Italy match. I was totally spazzing out that night, because France was SO CLOSE. SO CLOSE SO CLOSE SO CLOSE.

Anyways, Euro 2008 is gonna be cool, and I'm happy Germany won hee! I'm curious to see how Sweden will do on the 10th and France tomorrow. Those are the three teams I'm cheering for. GO TEAMS GO!

Oh god, I wish it was 2010 for the next Fifa World Cup. 2010...that will be another kickass year. Think about it: Nightwish with a new album, Papa Roach likely in the studio again, Fifa, the winter Olympics in Vancouver, I will have been done with high school for a year by then, and hopefully will be heading off to Europe for exchange with the university. If things go according to plan, I'm betting 2010 will almost be as good as 2008. Maybe. No way of predicting the future, though.


Fifa 2006 was epic though. And my favourite player (Zinedine Zidane) won best player! Despite his infamous headbutt haha.

I tried to watch the last half hour of the Germany vs. Poland match today, and then Dallas is like,"SPORTS?!" and I'm like, "Yeah, soccer!" and he just grumbles something, so I changed it to Punk'd.

Okay, enough soccer talk.

I was going through Sonic Syndicate's tour album, and found a picture they took from the Winnipeg show.

Look closely. Very closely. What do you see? Do you happen to see this?

Oh god that smile on my face >.<

I look like such a dork. I don't even remember smiling. It must have been subconscious thing lmfao.

I hate my smile *glares at self*.

Anyways, yeah, that was pretty trippy to see. I just had to share.

Currently Listening: Falling Down by The Birthday Massacre

Despite the harm you've done,
You swallowed your rejection well.
Amplified.
Sing your song alone.
Trace your footsteps home.

Edit: I just had a minor spazzy because I remembered Marco giving me metalhorns. XD Oh god, that was seriously the BEST night of my LIFE. No wonder I was smiling.

"I'm a dirty motherfucker!"

Today I got to look at many, many old photographs. I always found it kind of cool, to see how things were like 50 years before I was born. Like, my great-grandma and great-grandpa looked so happy together...it must have broke her heart when he died. My god, she's been a widow for like 23 years now. But anyways, moving on, it was quite interesting.

I'm totally pissed at mtv.de for buying the rights to this year's Rock am Ring. The first year I really want to watch it and it isn't streaming. Those fuckers are only playing a few of the acts. Meaning not Nightwish :(. At least in 2007, I had Papa Roach (even though poor Jacoby was sick...it sounded like he was really hurting himself singing, particularly in Forever), and in 2006 there was Placebo, and in 2005 there was Papa Roach again (in top form. omg Jacoby was so supremely hot back then). But the one year that I REALLY really care about seeing the performances (or at least one of them) and they stop their fucking livestreaming. Apparently the site/tv station that usually airs it wants to show up to 10 hours from the performances over the course of the summer, so I'm desperately hoping for some Nightwish in there. At least there will be Wacken and Bloodstock filmed (as far as I know).

Also, Anette cut and dyed her hair O.o. It doesn't look bad, just different. Besides, I'm partial to red hair, as some may have guessed by the fact that my hair was a semi-reddish colour for close to four years (though I just dyed it like two days ago, so it is not any longer...I foresee red again in the future of my hair colours, though). AND EMPPU IN BLUE IS TO DIE FOR! And Marco's socks are pure awesome. And and and :p
Well, Tuomas and Jukka are ceaselessly awesome. AND SHEXY!

I uploaded for your listening pleasure my top 3 albums at the moment XD. Enjoy while I keep the links up.

I IZ PIRATE!

Dark Passion Play
The Heroin Diaries Soundtrack
Getting Away With Murder

Guess what? All three of those singers have hot, hot voices XD. The little shiveries I get from Jacoby's voice are far superiour to either Anette's or James' shiveries though. Oh, Jacoby, how I would die for you. :p

I picked up my PRoach/Sixx:A.M. tix today! OH THE HAPPINESS!!! Shit seats, I'm still sad about that, but oh well. MY MUMMY MIGHT GET ME A MEET AND GREET! and that is fucking amazing in and of itself. And a real one, not the shit one that Nightwish had. Speaking of which, I found out I could just hop on down to Ticketmaster and buy tix for Seattle there. So I think I will do that sometime during the week. I have to convince Holly to go to the concert with me, because it would be uber awkward to go with my dad. At least Holly and I are more like friends than "she's a parental figure". It would still be WEIRD, but less so. I could just ask Amanda I suppose...though that might be even more awkward since she's like 3 years younger than me, and probably has never even heard the name of Nightwish, and shares virtually no interests in common with me anymore, and also, the only reason she used to be friends with me is because she was using me. At least Shanel had heard of them, and heard some of their songs too, for that matter. I don't know, but my mom won't let me go to the concert alone. I'd still meet up with Joe, and he and I decided we would wait for many many hours in line, because we do want front row after all, and then he said we'd go looking for some of the band members after too. I'm really hoping he can go.

And now, because I feel like it, A MEME.

When you're having a bad day, what comfort food do you reach for?
Ice cream.

Do you have an item that is your good luck charm?
For exams, I bring something small that means a lot to me, on the off chance it might indeed bring luck, or at least keep me from hyperventilating.

Does global warming and the hole in the ozone truly bother you?
Nah, I'm liking that our winters are less cold. Though the fact that it took until today for summer to be here is mildly irksome.

How many times have you moved in your lifetime?
A lot of fucking times. I lost count. We used to move every year.

Do you watch professional wrestling and is it real?
I don't know and I don't care. And I don't watch it.

What's the regular unleaded gas price where you are?
A buck thirty two point nine per litre.

Do you know someone who's been injured in Iraq?
No.

Do have smoke detectors in your home?
Of course.

Would it be easy to erase YOUR identity?
Probably.

When your mind wanders, where does it go first?
I don't know, it depends on what I'm predominantly focused on at the time. Like lately it's been going to getting a job, or just worrying over not being able to go see Nightwish after all.

What did you do on your first date?
It never was official.

Who was your first best friend?
Sinikka

When did you first realize that life isn't easy and fun?
Grade 6 when all that shit went down and the family got all broken.

The last thing you thought about before you fell asleep last night?
I totally don't know.

The last thing you'd find yourself wearing?
Any kind of fetish outfit O.o.

What will be the last thing that you do today?
I don't know.

What is the ONE best thing to do when you need to relax?
Guitar. Or just laying on my bed with the music on full blast.

On average, how much time do you spend on the computer everyday?
Way too fucking much. Funny thing is that it bores me out of my skull, and yet I still stay on.

How would you react if you had to spend a few months of your life on a bus?
What kind of bus, first of all? If it was public transit then I would probably off myself. If it was a comfy bus, I would be alright as long as I had books, my mp3 player and a charger for said mp3 player. Well, and food and drink and stuff.

What do you look for in a friend?
Sense of humour, honesty and reliability.

What makes you hate someone in particular?
If they did something to me that would make me hate them.

Would you still like your boyfriend/girlfriend/crush if they gained 20lbs?
Yeah...how shallow do you think I am?

What makes you jealous?
I don't really get that jealous, but different things can set it off.

Is it wrong to stereotype and bash someone because of how they look?
It's wrong, but that doesn't mean I'm going to stop and it doesn't mean that anyone else is going to stop.

Honestly, have you ever made a racist comment?
I have. Though in actuality I'm not racist, sometimes one gets caught up in a moment (many other Manitobans would be able to relate, in regards to what my racist comment was).

What is something you are trying to work on?
I have a list.

Why do you think people forgive their friends after they have faulted them?
Because people like to feel comfort that they have someone there for them. No one really wants to be a loner.

What is something people lie to themselves about?
A hell of a fucking lot.

What is something that married couples make mistakes in?
Lots of things.

Do people know the real you?
Not really.

What do people think of you?
I don't WANT to know. Every time I find out, it hurts for years after.

What is the most beautiful thing about nature?
The freedom it (re)presents.

What's the best thing about you?
I doubt there is anything good about me.

Do you ever look at other peoples point of view? (Like your parents)
I try to.

What is something about your best friend that bothers you?
Best friends are fucking overrated. I don't have one.

What is something about all your friends in general that you don't like?
I never know what they say about me when I'm not there.

What is something that bothers you about hopeless romantics?
Their naivety.

What is something that other people probably don't know about you?
They don't know things for a reason, and I'm not about to share that over an online blog, sorry.

What is the past to you?
A fucked up series of events that led me to where I am today (which isn't a bad place, I might add).

Do you like things to stay the way they are, or for change to happen?
I acknowledge that change can be good, and some changes are for the better, but that doesn't mean that I go through the process well.

What is something that you should do to make a better tomorrow?
There are a few things I could do, but I'm not about to do any of them.

Will you even bother trying to make a difference?
I have tried, it just never seems to work.

When was the last time you cried in front of a bunch of people?
Grade 7.

What do you have to say about what happened that day?
It was one of the shittiest days of my school life.

When was the last time someone said sorry and MEANT it?
I don't know if anyone ever means it. There's no way for me to know that. As for myself, I mean it almost every time I apologize.

How old do you think you act?
It varies.

90 minutes later - So, I just finished watching the orgasmic musical experience called "Live & Murderous in Chicago" and I have had some thoughts. I think, performance-wise, Nightwish and Papa Roach are pretty much equal, the difference being that Nightwish interacts more with each other, whereas Jacoby is fucking killer with the audience. Yeah, the Nightwish guys (and gal) are absolutely amazing with the audience too, but Jacoby goes into the audience and sings, he gives people hugs in the middle of the show, he puts the mic to people's faces and has them sing for him. It's amazing to watch. There's no sing-alongs at a Nightwish concert, just the little "hey, hey, hey" things. That being said, Jerry and Tobin virtually DON'T interact with the audience at all, and stay on their respective sides, where Marco and Emppu are all over the stage and Emppu in particular is tossing out picks left right and center. Coby has tons of energy, and I guess that kinda makes up for it. He does have A.D.D. after all, and it's totally obvious in his performance, like how he beats his head with the microphone occasionally. That guy's amazing though. Even at giant festivals like Rock am Ring, he gets the audience right into it and has sing-alongs and everything going there too. FUCK I HOPE I GET TO MEET HIM.

Oh, and that DVD is totally sexlicious with all those fantastic Jacoby-package shots ^.^

DAMN! I have to call my dad/Holly before they go to bed, since it's like 9:30 their time, and Holly's prone to falling asleep at the same time as Aiden, lol.

Currently Listening: Between Angels and Insects by Papa Roach

'Cause everything is nothing

And emptiness is in everything.

This reality is really just a fucked-up dream,

With the flesh and the blood that you call your soul.

Flip it inside out,

It's a big black hole.

EDIT: WHAT THE FUCK. Their number isn't in service. This means that they moved and didn't feel the need to a) inform me or b) give me their new number. Please excuse me as I go slit my wrists because my father doesn't love me :(

I'm kidding. I can't handle physical pain anyway, I would never make it as an emo :p

*whispers* I'm sorry

I never thought it would matter this much to me, because it shouldn't, but it physically revolts me.

And then I got to wondering what kind of fucked-up things a psychiatrist would see with these weird reactions of mine to different things, if I were to see one. Probably some logical explanation that's right in front of my face but that I just can't or won't focus on.

Ever do that? Where you prevent yourself from thinking certain thoughts and feeling certain feelings because of some weird thing in you where it's like if you think it then everyone will know? Or is that just me being fucked up again? Aha.

Also, I totally need a new project. Non-computer project. I'm thinking a Nightwish scrapbook or something, so that it can remind me that I actually do enjoy life, that'll give me something positive to focus on when things aren't so great, and it can be something that gets my ass out from in front of this computer, away from TVs, and is not just me sleeping. I sleep too much lately during the afternoons and not enough at night. But we'll see. It would require obtaining a scrapbook first.

Sorry about this post btw. I try not to post twice in a day. But I had to vent, so I did. Also, I'm gonna blog every day this month, so prepare yourself.

Currently Listening: You're Better Off Dead by Children of Bodom

Mind your own business and leave mine alone.

Take a look at the real world for a sec.

It's a hell for heroes and heaven for fools,

Makes you the luckiest bastard on earth.

It's not the first time, and this won't be the last.

Last night from midnight until 2 AM, I had the absolute single most disturbing and dirtiest conversation of my life (which is saying somethnig...I'm not exactly what you'd call "pure-minded"). Oh, it started innocently enough, with Anette trying to get Lucky Charms from Jordan Knight (I had Anette as my dp...Shanel had Jordan as hers), but then this led to Shanel saying Anette looked like she was trying to seduce her, and I told her that no, Anette only has a crush on Tuomas and Jordan and it all went downhill from there. Seriously woah.

Actually, it was just me doing all the talking. Shanel's comments consisted primarily of "OMFG OMFG OMFG" and "I DON'T WANNA KNOW".

So we learned a few things about Anette and Tuomas...and Emppu's flute of seduction (inspired by the pic of Emppu I put as my dp once Shanel got creeped out by Anette)...we talked about Jukka's drumsticks (which I refuse to allow him to use for sexual pleasure devices), and we speculated a bit more on Anette and Tuomas... also, there was dirrrrrty nasty orgy talk. Honestly, I don't know what the fuck is wrong with me O.o.

And a certain typo of Shanel's brought up tittyfucking and an entire disturbing conversation followed that. It really is quite traumatizing. I scared MYSELF with some of the things I said.

Also, we've determined that Emppu is gonna bop me at the concert in Seattle. LMFAO.

Oh also, I brought up a conversation Claire and I had in grade 8 regarding waxed broomstick handles, and that led to YET ANOTHER nasty scenario. Which was what I ended with before I went to bed. Shanel and I both thought that the moment would pass after I got some sleep, but I was just a dirty this morning.

We were tired this morning because Emppu kept us up late...and also we were being voyeurs on Anette and Tuomas :p
Isn't that right, Shanel?

Anyways, I had to bring that up. I'm gonna have a hard time topping (lmfao oh the dirty thoughts in my head right now) that conversation. I'm sure it will be fun, and also, traumatizing Shanel is just hilarious.

Oh, and by the way, Anette's a cannibal. We also determined that last night.

SO WHAT THE FUCK IS WITH THE WEATHER.
I got to school looking like a drowned rat and all I did was wait for 5 minutes in the rain and walked two blocks. And my clothes didn't dry virtually AT ALL in the 3 hours I was at school. It was a fucking hurricane out there, seriously. Thank you Shanel for lending me your sweater today. Even though I didn't warm up very much in the time I used it (not your sweater's fault).

Thank god the afternoon 44 bus-driver stopped to wait for me. Though there were these two girls on the bus that were like my age that kept giving me dirty looks. They were probably wondering who the weirdo was, since likely they know everyone in the area, since likely everyone in the area goes to the same school, and so they've never seen me before.

HOLY FUCK I'M GRADUATING IN A YEAR O.O

And I didn't make a banner, obviously. I tried, but then I got bored and frustrated, so instead I worked on my Nightwish vid, which is about halfway done. THOUGH I WANT TO MURDER PREMIERE ELEMENTS.

Also, I only have 9 gigs left on my hard drive...down from 80. That's really bad.

OMG I COMPLETELY FORGOT ABOUT THIS. I just remembered cuz I was looking in my room for Joe's birthday present that I'm mailing off to him on Monday. Well, I'll just finish it off, though it's quite huge.

Day 10 - Lucerne - 22:50 - March 29th

So we're in Switzerland and it is BEAUTIFUL. So so so much nicer than Italy. Everyone is polite and helpful and the food is great. Real meat. We went shopping today but I only bought Swiss chocolate and a knife for my dad. Yesterday supper was chicken in some kind of (really good) sauce with shell pasta and peas. This hotel is really nice and clean and homey.

Today we hiked too, I forgot to mention. I'm a bit sore. Also, Chapman is a prick. I bought M&Ms and iced tea and when I opened the M&Ms the package broke all open and over half the pack fell onto the floor. This happened and I said nothing. Then my iced tea fell and I said, "Fuck!". Mrs. Mahon didn't care at all but Chapman's like, "Excuse me?" so I gave him a look and said, "Crap." and he has this look on his face like I'm treading a very fine line and says, really drawn out, "Hooooly." I wanted to fucking hit him in the face. Like, as if he hasn't heard a student say the word "fuck" before. Asshole.

Also, the Americans are amazed that I can speak French. It's funny.

Day 11 - Alsace - 23:28 - March 30

France has been nice so far.

Our trip here had us stop in Germany's Black Forest for a cuckoo clock demonstration, food, and a tiny bit of shopping. I bought a glass turtle for Janice and a lass angel for Grandma.

Then we stopped in Colmar to shop a bit, though nearly everything was closed since it's Sunday. It was just to kill time because we were ahead of schedule.

Tonight's hotel is a Best Western and it is wonderful! Though only for one night. I got online to find a shitload of comments on my fanfic which has been linked to a Livejournal community (which I'm part of). I'd really like to be home and writing that since I've so many ideas but I, evidetly, cannot. 5 more days.

Tomorrow's Paris, which will be...interesting.

Supper was tuna salad (ewwwwww!), spghetti (that was fantastic!) and breaded chicken with ice cream for dessert.

Absolutely gorgeous weather until nighttime, and now it's really windy.

Really getting homesick at this point.

Day 12 - Paris - 23:21 - March 31

We've arrived...it rained through the day but we got here and it stopped. We took the subway (though I often want to call it "metro" now) to the restaurant, which was Chinese. Since I hate Chinese food, that sucked.

Not much else to say. Tempers are flaring as people grow increasingly homesick (or just craving some alone time) and everyone's bitching all the time.

We wanted to go to the Louvre today since it's closed tomorrow but we got there too late and weren't allowed in. That was pretty disappointing, but it was cool to see the pyramids from the Da Vinci Code.

No internet here, unfortunately, but I'll survive.

Tomorrow we're going to the Eiffel tower and I'm going to meet my mom's friend Isabelle.

Day 14 - London - 20:24 - April 2

Yesterday was pretty cool. As a group, the Canadians went to Montmartre. We were given an hour for lunch, so me, Lizzie, Chantal and Paige wen to an outdoor restaurant at the beckon of a nice man. Big mistake. Drinks alone cost 7.30€. I had a Coe, fries and a 6" sub and it cost 20€. Fucking rip-off. Then me, Lizzie and Kevin went to check out the St-Eustache church and Notre-Dame cathedral. Personally, I thought that St-Eustache was a lot nicer.

We met th rest of the group (who had gone shopping) at the hotel and then we went to Flam's for supper, which was pizza. Skinny pizza, three whole ones. Dessert was more pizza, one apple cinnamon, the other chocolate chip. Chocolate was good. After supper we went to the Eiffel tower where I met Isabelle. She's really nice, but I dind't get to talk to her for long because the rest of the group was heading up. So I went to the top of the tower and it lit up while I was in the elevator, on the way. It was gorgeous. We headed down and some guy told me to give a rose to Chantal from him. I asked how much and he said free 'cause he "liked her". The he told me to pay, 2 roses for 5€. I had like 2€ on me and only got one anyways, so I told him no. Then he went and gave a rose to Paige and told me then to pay. I gave him the 2€ and he told me to get another three but thankfully we had to leave for the boat.

The boat ride sucked. It was an hour later because of water height or something and then it was dull and everything I saw from the bus. Pointless. Went to the hotel and promptly fell asleep.

Today we caught the train to London where we were supposed to get on a bus right away and go for a tour. The bus was stuck i traffic and arrived 4 hours late. In this time, I bought Kerrang!, which has a small article on Nightwish (I think I've read it about five times now). The bus finally arrived and we went for the tour. Our tour guide was great and London is quite interesting. I love the accents; they make me smile.

Fish and chips for supper and I had to sit with the American girls. I may have misjudged them; they seemed quite nice and friendly. If only I knew what they said about me once they were out of earshot.

In a room with Ellen and Alex. Really awkward and no attempt to be friendly. Oh well, only one more night.

One more night!

I hope to go to Abbey Road tomorrow...

Day 15 - London - 22:58 - April 3

The day is ended and so closes WPC's Europe trip. All 'round it's been really interesting to experience different cultures, meet new people, make friends with previous aquaintances and see different things.

London, I have to say, is my favourite city. Not only does everything look quaint and clean, people aren't afraid to be "different", to look and act "outside the norm". It's really rare to see in Winnipeg.

Anyways, today we went to Leicester Square and the National Gallery. They gave us the afternoon for free time, so me, Chantal and Paige took off to do some shopping. I bought an England hoodie (which is the first touristy thing I've bought), a cross necklace that looked cool, a paintingprint for Holly and a Sirenia CD. The HMV here is EPIC! I wish the ones in Winnipeg were that big!

There were two downsides to today.

I lost my credit card this morning and sarch frantically for it for like an hour, called my mom at 4 AM her time to tell her and she transferred $300 to my debit card to withdraw, called CAA to report my card lost and they suspended it.

Turns out it was in Paige's purse.

And we got lost and Paige started yelling at me in the middle of a crowded square. We had been looking for the meeting place but could not find it and she was getting mad 'cause my suggestions weren't the right places.

Actully, one was. We passed it by, found it later. I really wanted to get my mom a necklace or something pretty and expensive, but had no time once we got lost. I bought her a scarf. I hope she likes it anyway.

I'm going to move to London one day.

Well that's it. Trip's over. 'Twas awesome!

What happened after: My cross necklace was almost confiscated at Heathrow airport, and there was a good ten minutes spent by three people who were trying to decide whether or not I was going to stab anyone with it. I got to keep it though. Security measures there are way higher than security here. We don't have to take our shoes off here, for example. There was a delay at the Toronto airport to get back home, by like two hours. We all passed out on the floor of the airport because we'd been up for over 24 hours. I have never been so happy to be home in my life. Shanel glomped me almost as soon as I was off the stairs, but I was so tired I didn't recognize her until a few seconds had passed. She hugged me before my parents did, haha. There was snow outside, so that sucked a lot. But I was home, so I didn't care!

All my pics are here.

Seriously, British accents are the most adorable things ever.

Priceless quote (not said to me) from London:
Guy: So are you guys American?
Ellen: No, we're Canadian.
Guy: You know what I like best about Canadians? They aren't American.

That would suck if I moved there though, because of my accent (or lack thereof), it wold be automatically assumed I was American. According to Melanie (my mom's friend who lived there for like 6 years), she got treated really badly because they thought she was American. And sometimes she'd say she was Canadian and they'd go, "Same thing."

Man why do they hate Americans so? I mean, I know I'm bitter about them, but that's mostly residue of the way their media portrays Canadians (the dumb, high people to the North who are focused entirely on back bacon, maple syrup and beer. Also, we're all complete hillbillies). In actuality, the vast majority of Americans I've ever spoken to are the nicest people ever. But oh well. I guess Europeans wouldn't listen to a Canadian saying that, would you guys? Because I'm just as bad ;-).

Whatever, I still want to live in Europe. It would be awesomesauce, and I actually think that the U of W has an exchange program to a German university that has film courses in English too. U of W has exchange to Sweden, but their film program's in Swedish, so I wouldn't be able to go. GERMANY IS JUST AS GOOD THOUGH!

Currently Listening: Heart Failure by Sixx:A.M.

As the blood is rushing to my head
And from my wrists.
I'm in love with all the things
I know I should resist.
And all the times you said to me
That falling down was destiny.
A simple thought occurs to me.

This is just a courtesy call.

Hellu.

If you tried to visit late last night or earlier today, you would have found my blog set to private. Now do you see why? And what do you think of the new layout? A new header is in the works, and will likely be up later tonight, or even after I eat lunch. The background's something I literally just threw together in Photoshop. I'll probably make something nice, but for the time being, it works. If anyone's up to it, make me a header or background, since any would kick my own headers' and backgrounds' asses. Just send me an email, it's in my profile. It's cool if no one does, but you'd be credited. And yeah, I'll make some shit to put on here within the next couple weeks.

Hmm, so I finally downloaded Sixx:A.M.'s album, and OMG! It's so fscking ORGASMIC. It isn't often that I like every single song on an album the first time I listen to it. I tihnk the ONLY albums in the past where on first listen I've liked it in its entirety are Dark Passion Play and Getting Away With Murder.
You
must
listen
to
this
album.
It
is
so
absolutely
fantastic.
Love
it.

Sixx:A.M. kicks your ass. As well as Motley Crue's. I'm soooo happy I'm seeing them live! Papa Roach and Sixx:A.M. in one concert omg XD.

Don't have much else to say.

I'm completely hopelessly absolutely ADDICTED to Papa Roach again because Jacoby is SO HOT OMG. His voice totally melts my weak little heart. I swoon on the inside for him all the time.

No no Nightwish isn't being replaced.

IN FACT! I did some calculating and found that even if I were to get a job in July and worked full-time, I would have enough money to go see them after 5 weeks! SO IT'S PRETTY MUCH A FOR SURE THING! YAYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!! Gahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhd so pumped you have absolutely no idea! I die a little bit with happiness on the inside every time I think about it. I'm way more excited for that concert than Papa Roach. But Papa Roach has a new album coming out soon omg! Everything's SO FUCKING GREAT! I officially adore 2008.

Officially.

Currently Listening: Tomorrow by Sixx:A.M.

And are you terrified by sadness?
And have you given in to madness?

You're running out of places to hide.

'Cause everybody's got a reason

To justify how they're feeling.

Maybe you should open your eyes.

aghhhhhhh

My Oceanborn CD arrived today! I hadn't realized that I actually wound up ordering the 2008 re-released collector's edition or whatever, but it's all cool. The "autographs" are actually on the CD itself, and barely visible for that matter, but it's interesting because Emppu's looks the same now and Tuomas' and Jukka's look a lot messier now than they did then, aha. What else is so special about this edition, you ask? Well there's a big-ass biography in the CD booklet, and a little thing about Oceanborn on the back of the CD, as well as 4 bonus tracks, 3 of which are live. I'm not much of a fan of live tracks (the ones on OTHAFA give me a headache, that damn warbling), but we'll see I suppose. All in all, I wouldn't have paid extra for it, but I didn't so it's all good! Now I just need Angels Fall First to have all their studio albums (singles to be worked on following this).

I totally want live tracks of the "new era" performing the old songs though. Like, properly recorded ones. I would kill for that.

I haven't eaten today. At all. It's almost 5, and I feel insanely ill BECAUSE I haven't eaten. Obviously the simple solution would be to eat, but the question is...what? I'm not going to cook a meal, since the parents are gonna be home in like half an hour, and they'll be making supper (*crosses fingers that it's something she'll actually eat*), and there's virtually no snack foods appealing to me right now. I guess I'll just be patient and starve for a bit more.

Also, I feel like someone's ripped open my stomach and is clawing around on my insides. But that's not because of the hunger. :S

I'm completely exhausted today, and I don't know why. I even went to bed like an hour earlier than usual last night and passed out right away. Though I woke up many times during the night...I was quite restless apparently. It's actually becoming a problem, I think, the amount of times I wake up in a night. Seriously, that can't be normal. I can wake up like five times in an hour, no exaggerating. I don't get it. But oh well.

STILL haven't picked up my PRoach tickets. REALLY have to get on that.

And my mom is insisting I take up lessons again *rolls eyes*. Either film courses or keyboard lessons. I can't take film courses though, due to my busted video camea, so I guess keyboard lessons it is. Whatever, that' all cool. I wanted to do that anyway, it just sucks because the keyboard at home is insanely outdated. Well, I'll get a new one if I don't wind up going to Nightwish, but I still manage to save a lot of money for it. And then I'll get a new guitar. I have wanted a new guitar for like 3 years now...Though mine's all covered in awesome stickers and stuff. I'll keep that one in one tuning and use the other for a different kind. Well depending on if I get a floating bridge or not, because if I get a guitar with a floating bridge...it's staying in one tuning. Those things are absolute BITCHES to tune, apparently, and I would believe it.

Well, I guess I'll take off. Fanfic's updated, but honestly it didn't turn out how I wanted it to, and it's about 200 words shorter than usual. Oh well, hope you like it anyway. And I'm gonna go and like collapse now.

Currently Listening: Crash and Burn by Savage Garden

Let me be the one you call,

If you jump, I'll break your fall,

Lift you up and fly away with you into the night.

If you need to fall apart,

Well I can mend a broken heart.

If you need to crash, then crash and burn,

You're not alone.

That is possibly my absolute favourite pick-me-up song EVER.